BREAKING NEWS -
Diamondbacks acquire $11 million in payroll flexibility from Mets for stretch run
The Associated Press

6:50 p.m. ET - The Arizona Diamondbacks have officially acquired $11 million in payroll flexibility from the Mets in a last-ditch effort to help their run at the NL West Title. The Mets picked up a left-handed-hitting outfielder named Shawn Green in the deal.

Arizona GM Josh Byrnes released this statement:

"We believe that moving Shawn Green's contract was the final piece we need to make a run at the division. All season, our roster has been severely lacking the presence of eleven million dollar bills, so we're hoping this is the move that finally puts us over the top and gets us into the playoffs."

With the Mets insurmountably ahead in the NL East, the team decided to make a move for the future.

Said Mets GM Omar Minaya, "Granted, we'd love to have that $11 million on our club for the playoffs, but we have a logjam at the Payroll position, and believe this move is in the best long-term interests of the franchise. In return for the money, we've picked up a not-solid, not-young bat who we figure will only get worse over the next couple seasons."

The $11 million dollars could not be reached for comment.