I wrote a column in high school and sent it to the future!

Here are some of the other columns I wrote in my teenage angst that we should be expecting shortly:

In my eyes, indisposed
In disguise as no one knows
Hides the face, lies the snake
The sun In my disgrace
-- "Blackhole Sun" by Soundgarden

Jarome Iginla, won't you come and wash away the rain?

I don't practice Santeria
I ain't got no crystal ball
Well I had a million dollars but I, I'd spend it all
-- "Santeria" by Sublime

Scott Neidermayer has got something for Sancho's punk ass.

Tied to a wheel fingers got to feel
Bleeding through a tourniquet smile
I spin on a whim slide to the right
I felt you like electric light
For our love, for our fear
For our rise against the years and years and years
-- "Machinehead" by Bush

Marty Turco got a machinehead, better than the rest, green to red, machinehead - I walk from my machine...I walk from my machine...

And to love: a god
And to fear: a flame
And to burn
A crowd that has a name
-- "Selling the Drama" by Live

Alex Ovechkin, I've willed, I've walked, I've read, I've talked, I know, I know, I've been here before - hey heyyey, now we won't be raped, heyyey, now we won't be scarred like that, heyyey, no we won't be raped, no we won't be scarred like that...

They rally round tha family! With a pocket full of shells
They rally round tha family! With a pocket full of shells
-- "Bulls on Parade" by Rage Against the Machine

Bulls on parade! DAHNAN DAN-DAHAN DAN-DAHNAN DAN-DAHNAN Vincent Lacavalier DAHNAN DAN-DAHAN DAN-DAHNAN DAN-DAHNAN!